Where are you holding yourself back?
I’m back running to a training plan, the sub 20 5km goal is back on. A goal that came into my horizon in August 2019 when I ran sub 21 after what felt like a lifetime hoovering around the 21 minute mark, filling me with frustration and eventually passion. A passion to keep pushing, until I finally saw 20:58 printed on the result slip at a local race.
Last week I made my way to the local park to run an interval session. Where you run fast for 30 seconds, then slow for 90 seconds, ten times – using the lake like a track. After the first fast 30-second interval I felt it, the frustration. I knew I could run faster but it wasn’t coming. Then I saw it, my excuse, a lady feeding the pigeons just as I was taking the bend of the lake. This happened again, and again, the frustration rising. First at myself, then the lady. I was having to run, fast, through hungry pigeons. The frustration bubbled into shouting, in my head, “stop feeding the pigeons”. Over–exaggerating I know.
Then it happened, the pigeon lady left the park and I realised I was using her as an excuse to get stuck. After having a word with myself, a lot happens at the lake, I told myself, again in my head, to “Just go for It”.
The next thing I know I am running fast, hallelujah. In a congratulatory tone, I announced “thank you” to myself. But I wasn’t done. On my last fast sprint, I really went for it after proclaiming, “This time give it your all”. As I was running on what felt like my tiptoes, arms rapid, breathing heavy I looked down at my Garmin watch and saw a super-fast pace. I smiled, a smile that I know means I had finally found my missing mojo.
We all have the ability to tap into the passion that lives inside us, to get fired up, to ignite the belief that drives us forward towards our goals.
Most of us carry around a bag of excuses, that keep us stuck. They feed into the narrative we are repeating in our minds - why we can't do something. Encouraging the victim self-talk to build and grip us into either non-action or self-sabotage behavior.
And most of us also know that all we need to do is give ourselves permission to simply drop the excuses and step forward - that's when the real work starts.
When you let go of the excuses and resistance, you become committed. There is nowhere to hide, you need to take action to move forward.
We are excuse-making creatures. I could have easily avoided the pigeon-feeding lady by running away from the lake, but I kept running into my excuse until I realised I was sabotaging my own progress. Clever, but very annoying.
By taking full responsibility, the narrative changes. The victim disappears. Always remember nothing changes, if nothing changes. Believe in yourself, then take action to reinforce your belief!
Very soon, in July, I will be that girl again, chasing down my 5K PB, at the same race I ran a sub 21 min in 2019. It feels like I am starting from the bottom – which I like as there is only one way....Up!
Don’t be afraid to stretch yourself – by stretching you grow, and when you grow you walk into new opportunities. And that is where the aliveness lives. Where are you holding yourself back? Get curious, be brave, and let go of the excuses! Watch out for your version of the pigeon feeding lady.